Push Presents: The Divisive Trend of Post-Birth Gifts

The arrival of a newborn is one of the happiest moments in a couple’s life, a miraculous event that brings the gift of life into the world. And while the gift of life is certainly the most important gift of all, another type of gift has been steadily gaining popularity – the push present. What is a push present you may ask? A push present is a gift that is given to a new mother from her partner, to celebrate her “pushing” of a new life into the world. While the sentiment behind the push present is one of love, the subject brings up a lot of controversy. Like breastfeeding, co-sleeping and crying it out, the push present is a hotly debated topic among moms.

The Case Against Push Presents

The biggest complaint against the push present is that it is commodifying the natural act of birth. Critics ask, “Shouldn’t the baby be reward enough?”. We live in a capitalistic and materialistic society and some people prefer that the act of giving birth be unaffected by all that. Another negative aspect is that it can put undue pressure upon the partner’s shoulders, in having to spend money on a gift at a time when finances might be extra tight.

The Case for Push Presents

The idea of giving a gift to a new mother is to show appreciation for what she has gone through, both mentally and physically. Pregnancy is an emotional time for a woman as they endure months of hormonal changes and physical discomfort, which culminates in labour and birth. While a healthy baby is the best gift in the world, it is thoughtful to give recognition to what the mother has experienced. It is given by the partner to show love and gratitude.

Push Present Ideas

Jewelry is a popular push present, made fashionable by extravagant celebrity gifts. Headlines were made when Jay Z gave Beyoncé a giant blue tanzanite ring to celebrate the birth of their daughter, and when Mark Anthony gifted Jennifer Lopez custom made canary yellow diamond earrings with a matching ring for the birth of their twins. While most people cannot afford such pricey gifts, jewelry is still a great option for a wide range of budgets. Diamond stud earrings or diamond eternity bands are very popular choices, as are pendants of the baby’s first initial, or a charm of their birthstone. There are no rules which say you must give jewelry, and gifts like a spa package or a new piece of technology can be just as meaningful.

What Moms think

While I am not a mother, being in my thirties I have a lot of close friends who are so I thought I would ask their thoughts on the subject. Out of six of them, two had been given a push present. One received a rose gold necklace to match her wedding band, and one received a new iPad. The ones who didn’t receive presents said they didn’t expect to get anything, and weren’t disappointed. However, everyone said they would have been very happy had they received one and couldn’t see why anyone would be upset by the idea. One friend said perhaps it was just the name “push present” that felt tacky, and not the gesture itself.

To Give or Not to Give

I think it all comes down to whether the partner wants to give a gift, and if they have the finances available to do so. If you want to give your new baby’s mother a gift to celebrate all that she has gone through, then you absolutely should. Just do it because you want to, and not because of outside pressure. The “push present” should not be expected or bragged about, it should be a sentimental symbol of a special moment in life. In the end a push present isn’t going to make the new baby anymore of a blessing, but it might be a bit of icing on the cake!

Have you ever given or received a push present? Would you want to? Let us know where you stand in the comments below!